Thursday, January 3, 2008

I killed my dinner with karate, kick 'em in the face

Yeah yeah yeah, I know I haven’t posted anything yet. But tonight, in a hotel in Dallas, I feel inspired.


After working 3 straight 10-hour days, I am no longer exhausted. I haven’t slept, nor have I gotten to really relax but presently, I am wide awake. I’ve got Sex and the City on TV as background noise as I try to figure out what I can write about, and I have suddenly become aware that I have no idea where my phone is. In cruising myspace, facebook, and a few other websites that I frequent, I’m seeing a large number of year end and New Year’s reviews and wrap ups. I think I’ll add mine to the masses.


2007 was fun. I took a semester off school, made some money, moved not only out of my home, but out of the damn state, and made some wonderful friends. My New Year’s Eve was a pretty accurate representation of my year as a whole. My day began with a few text messages to friends, asking where the evening’s festivities would take place. Partridge had no idea, as usual, and Dudley gave me details a few hours later, also as usual. After working a bit, I get ready and head out to Cornman’s. Upon entrance, I’m informed that we’re listening to Beatles LP’s, drinking champagne, and Cornman has been drinking since 5. After establishing that I’m less entertaining than the boys, I decide it’s better to watch, drink, and listen rather than be clever. This plan worked well. I got to be a part of their exceedingly dysfunctional group, and enjoy a truly comfortable and fun New Year’s Eve. After we came back inside from the boys smoke break, Dudley insisted on seeing me in the kitchen. I was the given information I will never forget:

“Put your hands on your head like a big, old moose,

Keep your elbows high, and your legs loose.

You jump around the floor, ad you skip and prance-

The next thing you know, you’re doing the Antler Dance!!”

Once Cornman had let us know roughly 47 times that he had a white cashmere scarf, and that we should be jealous, midnight was upon us.

3…2…1… Antler Dance time! 

 I was regrettably unable to participate in the antlered festivities, as I was taking pictures and getting a video of the first occurrence of this new tradition. I finished my champagne, and headed out about 20 minutes later. ‘But Whitney,’ I’m sure you’re thinking, ‘why the hell did you leave a New Year’s party at 20 minutes after midnight??’ The answer to your question is a ridiculous one, and one which I will answer in 2 parts.

1)    I’m a moron. I should have stayed. Especially after Dudley’s phenomenal midnight toast. There’s nowhere I would have rather been either, man.

2)    I had to be at work. Allow me to state that again, because it bears repeating. I had to leave a New Year’s Eve party at 20 minutes after midnight, after drinking 3 glasses of champagne, to be at WORK.

The job that I was going to was at MSU, where I was part of the 4-person crew responsible for taking down the decorations in the warm-up gym at the coliseum. I arrive 10 minutes late… to one other person working. That’s right, folks. I’m tipsy, the other girl there is tipsy, and that’s it. The 4-person job that was supposed to last no more than an hour had just transformed into a 2-person job that would take 3 and a half hours. When I realized this, I texted Partridge and Cornman to let them know that I was not going to be able to finish ringing in the New Year with them.

I arrive at my house at 4 a.m. I am pissed, sore, tired and I feel jilted. An evening that started with such promise had ended with me collapsing onto my bed, fully clothed and crying, and passing out.

Even though my night ended poorly, I still had more fun in the few hours I was hanging out with the guys than I’ve had in a while.

But, in the end, it’s all semantics anyway, right?

1 comment:

THE Justin Dudley whose Century is HIS said...


i actually misinformed you about the lyrics. i rewatched the lilly tomlin episode and right after "skip and dance" it follows "move your middle just a little and you're doing the antler dance"

but close enough.

and i'm glad you enjoyed yourself. i was thinking it was going to suck considering it was last minute and i could only scrounge together 4 people but i wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else in retrospect.

here's to the next new year (i hope)


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